13 Kinds of Passengers and Why They Should be Banned from Public Transport (Part 1)

To be born in a country where public transportation is the most common mode of travelling is, I guess, an advantage. Yes it is true that it is definitely not the most comfortable way of going from your house to your office. But then as you get use to it, you would probably have my back in saying that it does have its own charms. Public transport, as I put it, is just the place where you get to rub elbows with different (understatement) individualities and encounter absurd situations that would leave you shaking your head in utter disbelief. I had been commuting for like forever and I still find it amazing to come face to face with another kind of personality in one of my travels when I thought I have met them all already. But let me talk about them later. First, allow me to introduce to you the kind of people I have met during most of my jeepney, bus and van rides and why they should be banned from getting on these public transports.

1. The shampoo commercial model. I would like to blame ALL the shampoo commercials out there for giving birth to these kinds of earthlings. Who is behind the idea that it is okay for girls to let their hair down and allow it to fly freely? Excuse me but the person behind you doesn’t eat hair. Pull them back and keep them to yourselves, and if there is really a need to unleash the shampoo model in you, the corn fields are there to accept you with open arms. But please, not inside a jeepney or an open bus.

2. The bomb. Okay. Let’s be a little lenient over this matter. I live in a tropical country where you still get wet with sweat just minutes after you have taken a shower. Knowing this, we should arm ourselves not to get caught in an embarrassing situation aka explosion of body odors. But kuya, who is just a few meters away, didn’t get the notice and he just lifted his arms and released the smell that can send Sleeping Beauty’s entire Kingdom to an eternal rest.

3. The space occupier. Why can’t she sit down properly even after seeing some passengers trying to fit themselves in in an inch-wide vacant seat? IF you want the whole 9-seater van for yourself, go and rent the whole thing. Sometimes, it gets worse than that. The bag sits comfortably on the chair while some are just putting on a poker face to deal with killer leg cramps.

4. The rocker. In every mode of transportation that I have taken, not once have I encountered one without someone sleeping on it. Some sleep like an army—stiff and straight. Some sleep like an angry teacher—with their arms crossed. And then there is the rocker –body  in a straight position with their head either doing a full circle rotation or a banging motion. I don’t mind people sleeping. Really. What I do mind, on the other hand, is when their head land on my shoulders. Free pillows anyone? Oh! I am the free pillow. If you get lucky, like me, you’ll even receive a souvenir from them: SA.LI.VA.

5. The pubic display of affection advocate. When Deon Jackson sang Love Makes the World Go Round, surely he didn’t mean for people to go around expressing their love in public. Or did he? Point is, no matter how in love you are with each other, the people around you may not feel equally happy to see two strangers smooching with each each other out in the open, more so inside a public transportation where it is hot, crowded and definitely not conducive for dating. Some would even roll their eyes and, between gritted teeth, whisper… “Magbrebreak din kayo! (You will also break-up with each other!).

6. The customer service representative. Trademark: People with a phone on their hand and talk like they are running after a Guinness Book of World Record for the most number of phone calls in a short time. Although there is nothing wrong with making a phone call while on your way to your work, making your conversation audible where everyone can hear is not so wise. Remember that there are also a lot of things running inside your co-passengers’ head and hearing your discussion about how cute your seatmate is is probably the least of their worries.

—-to be continued—-

credits to the owners of the pictures